Facebook and people who constantly update statuses

[xplorer]

This girl on my Facebook, who is my step cousin added me to her facebook last year, she is updates her facebook everyday, telling everyone what she is up to constantly. She is virtually on it completely in her spare time. She is constantly use to go on about her last boyfriend on facebook all the time, saying how much she loves him, what they had been up to, saying how great he was. Then she split up with him, updating how much her life sucked.

And then she started talking to me on facebook everytime I was online, flirting, I think she was looking for a rebound, but one thing turned me off her, and that was she kept on slagging my aunt off, her step mother, saying how she wished she was dead and called her a bitch, and how she and her father would treat them badly. I already knew they had a turbulent past, a classic step parent - child relationship upbringing. She also told me that she took ecstasy  on nights out and on xmas day. Although I enjoyed talking to her, I never could totally trust her, so I never met up with her in person, despite her strong interest in me, she kinda talked down about my cousin being gay, I was also kinda confused about this because she has a sister who is a lesbian and she fully supports her being gay. She also joked about him looking like a cancer child, because he is bald. Having said all this, I do like her, and I did click with her, we would chat for ages, she has dated other guys since so I think she has kinda lost interest in me as I didn't take it any further. So we don't really chat on facebook anymore, having a boyfriend seems to be a big thing with her.

What do you make of her ?

Should I ever really bother with her and trust her? she is kinda tied into my family so I probably will encounter her one day again.

[voodoo scientist]

She's a classic child of Facebook, if they're old enough to be classic yet, anyway. Facebook culture is the natural answer to the "be who you are" culture. They don't know it yet, but they reject the notion that we have an inner core that somehow predetermines our actions or controls our limbic system and only rewards us for acting "correctly." They have tied their worth to the opposite of themselves - everyone but themselves. What they're doing is building an image or a brand, for the same reasons that previous generations pursued spiritual enlightenment - to them, completeness comes from other people knowing them better and in turn knowing them, not from knowing themselves better. In many ways there's never been a generation like this before, except maybe the Woodstock culture.

The vast majority of them will eventually grow up just like the Woodstock ones, and as they settle down more and more, they'll update Facebook less and less just like the Woodstockians did less and less acid and went to fewer protests. Facebook and "socializing" in this new fancy sense of the word is, however, an integrated part of mate selection to them that will likely continue until they are fully mature and comfortable enough with their mate to stop holding themselves to the mate selection conditions of Facebook. There are different mate selection rules to play by for every generation; it is not a universal truth that men have always picked up women in bars (in fact, on a sociological scale, the goal of mate selection is more often material or diplomatic than romantic in nature).

You may want to reconsider your strategy of selecting a mate via Facebook if you are not interested in people who are primarily Facebook users - at the least, you'll have to put up with a lot of updates until you start having kids, probably. And while tantalizing and no doubt effective at finding a mate today if used skillfully, the probability of encountering more 'false positives' like this on Facebook are fairly high,  and not all will be so obvious examples.

As for her, most likely she was probing you out with small talk. Look at the tour de force she took you on there - your opinion on your aunt (any unprepared reaction to the proposed death of a family member is likely to be strong and genuine), your willingness to lend sympathy, your opinion on psychoactive drugs and her doing them, and a host of derivative information. Those things alone uncover a considerable portion of your personality to someone with a degree of social ability and a prior relationship with you, even though it might not be something she's aware of. They're easy to click with because if you choose to, they will simply adapt their personality to revolve around you.

I like to think of them as anti-psychopaths. Rather than lacking in conscience, they're without any personal drive and must be driven by their peers. Very communist, really.

[dkdontforget]

One thing to think about, is something my history teacher pointed out. Years ago people wrote in journals. They wrote about everything they wanted to. What do people do now? Write about everything. Wether it be Myspace Twitter or Facebook. Its all basically a public journal. People want to feel important. Even though people want to keep their journals private, alot would feel something good if someone read it. I dont know how to explain it further. but do you see were im going?

[gone]

Xplorer you ask what people think of her, each person would think something different if they met this person, there is no point answering this question, it's subjective.
Personally I would advise you to put the control on her, HIDE her post so you can't see them. Add her to a group that can't see your post. Just edit her out of your facebook, even though she'll still be in your friends list sounds like a sensible approach to your problem.

Facebook makes me laugh. People only ever talk about themselves. This along with many other cultural activities just proves to me how 'self obsessed people are' I once wrote to facebook and asked if they'd change the 'My status' to 'My Subject' to encourage people to talk about something other than themselves.. hehe
I honestly don't think the masses have the ability to talk about 'subjects' my latest update on facebook was a picture of maggots in a mouth and a link to a psychology test on discust..  (more interesting than "I'm going to have a bath now"... (self self self)
I'd think there should be a campaign to start people talking about 'things' other than themselves..

Ps if you're interested in the psychology test of DISGUST you can do it here http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/mind/surveys/disgust/index.shtml