Guys Thinking vs Girls Thinking

[Balmung6]

Why do guys tend to think with their bodies when it comes to instinct, and girls with the mind? I know it's more or less true (and been abused on several occasions by mean=spirited girls) but why exactly is it like that?

[SWM]

this sounds like an interesting idea but i am not sure exactly if i fully understand it, can you give an example where a guy thinks with there body and a girl thinks with their mind when it comes to instinct.

[Balmung6]

Although this forum isn't usually for stuff like this, but to give you an idea of what I'm talking about, anything involving the bedroom in a relationship for the first time works as a perfect example:
A guy will usually more or less be willing, whereas a girl will usually need time to think it over. Guy's first instinct is with the body, girl's is with the mind. My question is why is that? Is it a mind-set? Biological? Something else entirely?

[tnerb]

This is kind of redundant....

Usually a guy will think more with out his body, and a girl more with her body. And the reason is simple, male is more seperated from his body female is more attached to their body.

[Balmung6]

Attached how, exactly? Like just more aware?

[darkdan]

From an evolutionary psychology perspective, males increase their chances to pass on their genes by being biologically active (that's my PC way of saying being a slut).  Whereas females need to pick a good mate that is strong and supportive.  Females are more invested in their child because they have to stick around to raise it and need to pick a mate that can help them.

This is why women are more picky about who they sleep/reproduce with and think with their head!

Plenty of other things go along with this.  Like women's hidden ovulation.  It encourages the male to stick around and have sex throughout a woman's cycle instead of just when she's ovulating.  This encourages a strong bond between them.  From a male's prospective, if he sticks around he can ensure it's his child and not someone else's.



As far as the rest of the men's motivation, yes, we think with our gentiles or about or gentiles in about everything we do.  Why do we want to be successful?  It encourages us being able to attract women.  Why do we want to be in shape?  Women.  Why do we want nice cars?  Women.

If it wasn't for the fact that "chicks dig [insert whatever here]" we wouldn't really bother with getting a job or anything.

[Shell]

Darkdan, I think you hit in right on the spot.  You couldn't have said it better.

Also, men are driven to mate, they instinctively choose women for their childbearing physique.  Usually, curvy hips and breasts are natural tips to the men that they can carry and feed a child.  Even if the men aren't looking for a long-term commitment let alone children, their natural instinct is to seek women whose bodies can promise a child.  Curviness = sexiness because of the triggers it causes in men's natural instinct to mate.

Women usually seek the bread winners. They want men who are independent, strong, masculine.  All things that give the appearance of support.  Support means financial stability, commitment to the relationship, emotional awareness, etc. In today's society, women have become more independent -- but the need for an independent man is still largely there. 

Of course, there are many exceptions as each individual has different taste and background. 

[Dom]

I agree with Darkdan, in fact I heard this also in my General Psychology class that males will want to mate to on the basis of [assing on their genes and that females will want to find a suitable mate to father their children

[teacup]

I agree with darkdan! Thank you for that post!

[Sniper15]

Men like to fuck. It's a proven fact

[Kallisti]

Women usually seek the bread winners. They want men who are independent, strong, masculine.  All things that give the appearance of support.  Support means financial stability, commitment to the relationship, emotional awareness, etc. In today's society, women have become more independent -- but the need for an independent man is still largely there. 

It goes past just supporting the child, the peacock effect theory also has women looking for successful men because that ensures the second set of genes is solid.

[liza123]

Do you think that all these still apply like those days in the CURRENT world? Times have changed and women are more independent. So, there have been changes in the way women thin and what they want

[Kallisti]

Not really, this is, if the theory is correct, hard wired, genetic, not cultural, changing times doesn't change our instincts, if it did we'd have stopped fucking instead of inventing condoms and birth control pills.

It does have a bigger effect on men than women though, since it carries over into non mating habits.

[Karaten]

A girl is meant to pick the man, the man is meant to be willing. Men are balloons of sperm, and their bodies are simply advertisement for the quality of that sperm.

[liza123]

A girl is meant to pick the man, the man is meant to be willing. Men are balloons of sperm, and their bodies are simply advertisement for the quality of that sperm.

How I wish, Karaten. That sounds really good. Why can't they follow the examples of the spiders and ants(correct me if i am wrong)? i like the scorpion mating dance as well...

[liza123]

Not really, this is, if the theory is correct, hard wired, genetic, not cultural, changing times doesn't change our instincts, if it did we'd have stopped fucking instead of inventing condoms and birth control pills.

It does have a bigger effect on men than women though, since it carries over into non mating habits.

Hmm. You are a man. Apparently, men 's instincts have not changed over the years....I can believe that.

I am not sure about women though. For my part, yes, I would be go for someone who is independent, strong, honest, etc. Not the masculine part(I mean as long as he is a heterosexual male!)

[OriginalResonance]

I've seen female bodybuilders and male fashion designers. All straight. What's the point of this thread, really? I suggest a read up on the plasticity of the human brain.

[Kallisti]

Hmm. You are a man.

No.

[liza123]

Not really, this is, if the theory is correct, hard wired, genetic, not cultural, changing times doesn't change our instincts, if it did we'd have stopped fucking instead of inventing condoms and birth control pills.

It does have a bigger effect on men than women though, since it carries over into non mating habits.

Well, you used the operative word 'we' for ......unless women do this as well?

Wait a minute,if you are a not man, it does not necessarily have to mean that you are a woman, right? So, what is it, a woman, a....?

[darkdan]

I've seen female bodybuilders and male fashion designers. All straight. What's the point of this thread, really? I suggest a read up on the plasticity of the human brain.

Big difference talking about the behavior of populations and the behaviors of individuals.

[Dollar hunter]

I say that mostly the boys want lust and the girls wnt true love.

[lolopo666]

@ liza think he said we'd ***************** that means as the whole population of humanity including you
BTW do you really do that censored thing(well you can leave it)?
Baldungg failed to say the right question he meant he meant that why do men are more sexually active while females are not (because they take time to decide) the answer is the male testosterone makes him do it WE are always ready to mate because we are fertile. while women (ex. liza) will only feel the urge of *** when they are ovulating

[Zepher08]

Talking about instincts is one thing but when diving into cultural conditions, meaning the head stuff they fill males and females with that are in accord to how women should be have and how men should behave and based on Patriarchy...we really have a lot of gap between what is instinct and what is cultural conditioning for both sexes.

I don't think it is instinctual for women to be passive or dependent. So the whole Idea of women being independent does not have to be a problem. Yet   conditioning does definitely play a part in how females deal with sexuality and how more or less it is repressed.

Sure the instincts appears that the female chooses a mate. I think males chose mates as well or they chose each other. Female is more selective and the male less selective but as far as instincts go I think a lot of instinct gets perverted and distorted by means of cultural control.
Females do become dependent when vulnerable aka ~ with child. Seems to me that a child is born into an entire tribe and now days there is no tribe ...every ones got thier own little tribe or trying to create one called family. People are interdependent.

I think a ot of females instinctual needs have been buried  and the brain wash of women being unable to be self serving is a legacy which has more to do with a saturated history of controlling patriarchal culture and NOT the instincts.

Take for example that women were forced to marry  a family chosen man for money etc. It isn't clear really what her instincts would actually do if she was to chose herself. peoples ideals about what is necessary as for as what is needed to survive are in my opinion extremely   distorted.  as In I need a billionaire . Humans do not need that much to survive but that head wash is the conditioning.

Many inventors and creative individuals have affected the world and they didn't come from a perfectly rich family so the mix of genes and monies or what ever the motive can not be applied to successful offspring. That is a myth and illusion. But it is a nice try at controlling nature.Although if a man is standing on the side of the road looking for spare change i wouldn't consider that to be a better choice if one is looking to breed.

Finally, I think there is more than breeding going on. Instincts are not solely based around procreation so I do not believe men wouldn't work because there is no woman. but , hey I am willing ot debate that one.

[Billy_27]

From an evolutionary psychology perspective, males increase their chances to pass on their genes by being biologically active (that's my PC way of saying being a slut).  Whereas females need to pick a good mate that is strong and supportive.  Females are more invested in their child because they have to stick around to raise it and need to pick a mate that can help them.

This is why women are more picky about who they sleep/reproduce with and think with their head!

Plenty of other things go along with this.  Like women's hidden ovulation.  It encourages the male to stick around and have sex throughout a woman's cycle instead of just when she's ovulating.  This encourages a strong bond between them.  From a male's prospective, if he sticks around he can ensure it's his child and not someone else's.

As far as the rest of the men's motivation, yes, we think with our gentiles or about or gentiles in about everything we do.  Why do we want to be successful?  It encourages us being able to attract women.  Why do we want to be in shape?  Women.  Why do we want nice cars?  Women.

If it wasn't for the fact that "chicks dig [insert whatever here]" we wouldn't really bother with getting a job or anything.

So, you basically are saying that everything men do is aimed to impress women?

I personally think that men who are secure and confident in themselves can attract women without doing anything in particular, other than being themself.

[darkdan]

So, you basically are saying that everything men do is aimed to impress women?

Basically.

I personally think that men who are secure and confident in themselves can attract women without doing anything in particular, other than being themself.

Yes, secure and confident are things women find attractive.  Some have it naturally.  Other men have to imitate it.


But the ones that do it best, women can't tell the difference between the act and the real thing.

Between the personae we display depending on the social context, is anyone ever really showing "themselves" to others?

[Billy_27]

Between the personae we display depending on the social context, is anyone ever really showing "themselves" to others?

I have met some people who show "themselves" completely as they are, to others. These people generally tend to be naive/innocent/rude/unsophisticated.

[darkdan]

I have met some people who show "themselves" completely as they are, to others. These people generally tend to be naive/innocent/rude/unsophisticated.

But are they always like that?  Do they act that way around their mother when you're not present?  If they sat between Obama and the Pope on a plane would they be that way?



However, I like where you're going with this.  A person like that may be the closest to "real" we'll ever get just because they lack the ability to self-monitor and change their behavior to be socially appropriate for the situation.

[Billy_27]

But are they always like that?  Do they act that way around their mother when you're not present?  If they sat between Obama and the Pope on a plane would they be that way?

I don't think anybody can behave in one manner in all circumstances.

However, I like where you're going with this.  A person like that may be the closest to "real" we'll ever get just because they lack the ability to self-monitor and change their behavior to be socially appropriate for the situation.

I agree. Either they are unable or unwilling to change themselves to be "socially appropriate".

[darkdan]

I don't think anybody can behave in one manner in all circumstances.

That goes back to my original point that can we ever really "know" someone?

[NoDifference]

I say there are two factors:
Current Occupation - Physical - Non-Physical
Purpose in Regards to Survival Strategy

First of all, if any person is active physically, they are likely to perceive more in physical perspective than not.  That current sort of perception carries over to anything the person does.  If my occupation is heavily consistent with sports or a physical job, my perception is heavily in regard to object awareness.  A person that is such can look at a situation, and see how things mechanically work as the objects and all of there factors come to in the mind with all of their mechanical qualities.  It's just there for them like a very socially occupied person perceives everything in a socially relevant way.  This person sees things as being able to be put into words and applied socially or not able to be applied socially.  It's two different kinds of engineering attachments the brains attach to actions and objects. 

These guys are not necessarily not about minds like you think, but they have the back up of their bodies to be less concerned about social nuances that are subjective to say the most about them. 

I'd assume that women when occupied with a physical job become the same way in perception.

Generally what is synthesized as being more rewarding is what is done more psychologically speaking.  If this behavior increases survivability, it likely is spread genetically. 

I assume that physical prowess increases survival rates, and men in the past thousands of years that had an affinity for being physically adept mentally and physically survived many more challenges than those that had less of an affinity.

Women being composed of much less testosterone would not be inclined to have the same affinity.  The next best power in the human genome is the brain, and beings they process language more adeptly, they would be much more interested in the mental activity of others.

Both genders are the same species.  When they are born, they psychologically go to the "toys" they have available.