Home

[MGify]

"There's no place like home." "Home is where the heart is."
I don't think these implies me.  In the last 20 years, I've lives in two completely different states.  And both homes, I've had a certain amount of bad memories.  One of them more than the other, but still.  Now I do have a roof over my head, but it's not the type of home I'm talking about.  I envy people when that say "I wanna go home"; because when I say it; I don't know where home is.  I don't have a place in my heart where I belong.
Now I know what you are thinking... "Stop being such a spoiled brat and stop being so dramatic!"  I know, at least I have a roof over my head and able to keep food on the table, but there's just a bit of me that feels a bit of loneliness.  I try not to think about it, but it always keep jumping up at me.  I feel I should feel embarassed and like I'm ungrateful for what I have and it's killing me.  It's just something that's been bothering me. 

[S. Earl Martin]

I can understand what you mean. When I was younger my parants moved alot because of my dads work. I literally would come home from school and see boxes in the driveway and within a few days would be living in a another house. It might be accross town or in a different state. I was always the new kid. Or worse I would transfer to a school that used to be our rival and would be the kid from that school.

Having a house or apartment or whatever is different than having a home. A home is a place where you can feel safe. Even if you are actually only so safe. When I got married my wife had the same circumstance when she grew up. They moved alot also. So we bought our place and even when we could afford to buy a bigger place we stayed here. I have lived in this house since 1984. I might die here who knows. I am safe here and that is something that most people can't say. I have two Oak trees I planted on the property. They started from acorns and are about 40-50 feet tall. A home is somewhere you can take pride in because it is yours. If you manage to pay it off and it is really yours it feels great. I am not trying to brag. I am saying this as encouragement. Having to worry about missing a few payments and having the bank take it away is a very tramatic experience. I have watched that happen to a number of my neighbors over the years. Also many countries in the world people either can't afford to own a home or are not allowed to because of the regulations. It is a privilage many people take for granted. Peace!