Social morality

[pljames]

I am a staunch moralist or opinionated to a fault. If I see another who is is rude to me, I try to understand why? What have I done to make them act that way. I care what people think of me, hoping nice thoughts which I to try too give off. But If I am convinced without a shadow of a doubt they have the problem I ask them (is there a problem)? I love fixing problems.

Anger has no gain except to make a valid point and to make the other person consider they misunderstanding or they judged me wrong. Is there a justifiable anger? Thoughts please. pljames

[SWM]

anger is the emotion you experience. this is not good or bad. it is just your experienced emotion. the reason for your anger may be rational or irrational and as such may be just or unjust. what you do with your anger, the behavioural expression of your anger will be good or bad for you  to the extent it achieves your desired goals.

Anger has no gain except to make a valid point and to make the other person consider they misunderstanding or they judged me wrong.

this is a very specific example of anger and has been constructed in a narrow context. you are viewing this situation through your anger with the other person in the example.

your goal in this example is to help someone understand you. do you think anger might help you to be understood in this situation? it might help the other person understand that you are hurt or frustrated in your attempt to connect with them. but they will likely observe your anger as aggressive and threatening and therefore understand you as being irrational. therefore your goals have not been met and in fact you have helped the other person to misunderstand you even more. your anger has taken you further away from your goal.

it would be useful to recognise what your original goal was and explore other possible ways of attaining that goal.