Trying to figure out a coach...

[phaser]

Hello!

Hopefully I am in the right place...maybe someone can help me figure out this coach!  I have a theory about the coach and I will get to it later below.

Sport it high school soccer - could probably be just about any sport though. 

I will start with the 'incident' and work backwards, trying to answer any questions as they arise.

My kid plays on one varsity HS team (A) which scrimmaged another varsity HS team (B) from a nearby town about 6 weeks ago.  The coach from the other team knows my kid well because my kid plays in that nearby town on a club team, however only practicing several times with this coaches team, never in a game.  My kid has a few friends on team B from playing with them on the club team.  One of the friends is close.  Kids are 14, 15 years old (HS freshman) all of whom are on the varsity team.  So far, pretty straight forward.

A few days after the scrimmage (this was the 2nd one by the way), the close friend of my kid said the coach went into a diatribe/tirade putting my kid down in front of team B at a practice, basically saying that my kid would not last long on the varsity team - no other details as why that was said but reading-between-the-lines we (my spouse and I) figured that the coach must have seen something that wasn't worthy of play on the field...what else could it be since that was all the exposure my kid had with that coach in quite some time (full disclosure, there was some disciplinary nonsense that took place about 8 months ago that the coach was handling in the absence of my kid's regular coach but I was assured my kid did not contribute to the problem - horsing around and the like).  So, this came as a surprise to my kid, the close friend who related it, me and my spouse.  We thought the coach liked my kid as a player and person and were surprised at the attack.

Fast forward to this past week...

My kid finds out (and I found out through parent channels) that the close friend is now riding the bench (when not running balls up and down the sideline) and basically on the coaches (*&^list.  The coach is also berating the kid and treatening to demote (to JV or freshman team I suppose).  This is very surprising because at the outset of the season (say, just prior to the scrimmages and into the season), the close friend seemingly was fitting in perfectly - probably in the top 5 of players on the team, and again, only a freshman.

So, we are wondering why the change-of-heart?

Here are a couple of assumptions/known factors...

1.  Assumption: I believe that the close friend is playing close to the same now as played 6 weeks ago.  In fact, probably slightly better assuming the usual - that players improve with time.  Let's just say, no appreciable difference either way. 

2.  Assumption:  The close friend is in the top 5 of players on the team.  I assume this because the kid is the #2 scorer of goals (4 I think to date) and has 3 assists.  The kid can play any field position and is equally good with either left or right foot.  The kid scored a goal in one of the scrimmages (maybe both) mentioned above (not included in the goal total of 4).

3.  Assumption:  In speaking with a parent from the nearby town (a parent of another kid who plays on the club team with my kid and the close friend), the situation from 8 months prior should not be a factor.  I am not so sure though.  My understanding of it was that some kids were so disruptive that the coach ended the practice early and told everyone to go home.  Again, I was assured that my kid was not involved (neither was the close friend who was also present).

4.  Known factor:  The coach has a reputation of being a taskmaster, maybe even nasty.   Coach is not liked.  But, the coach is knowledgeable and has a successful w/l record.  The town is probably pop 25k +/-, centrally located, so it has alot of talent to draw players from.

5.  Known factor:  The coach is homosexual.  This may or may not be a factor.  There have not been any passes or the like as far as I know - that would be a totally different story.   

Here is my theory which I would like comment on:

I think that when the coach went on the diatribe at the practice making statements to the effect that my kid's days were numbered on the varsity team, I think that the peson in mind was in fact the close friend - not my kid at all.  Shortly thereafter, say in the following two or three weeks, the coach soured on the close friend and now in the past 2 weeks or so, leading up to present time, the benching and berating has occurred.  The coach will not even talk to the kid.

I don't think that anyone would argue that the coach isn't a jerk - no question there.  But I would like opinions on my theory.  I honestly believe that the coaches tirade during the practice following the 2nd scrimmage, had more to do with the coaches attitude toward the good friend, and not my kid.  And, there is something other than performance on the field that is at the root of the problem. 

Is there a clinical explanation for this behavior - the substitution of my kid for the close friend in the diatribe?

Thanks for your help in advance!

[phaser]

Just wanted to add some more comments/thoughts.  I think I have the coach figured out...

What I think is most likely going on is (not unusual I supposte) that the coach is playing one player off on another.  Players get benched not necessarily because they are not playing up to some relatively subjective standard but rather to 'teach a lesson' to all players that hustle, competitiveness, drive and teamwork (again, all somewhat subjective as opposed to speed, reflex and technical ability which all can be measured) will be improved upon one way or the other and, in this coach's methodology, it will be done by benching.  I am sorry to say that I think that this is effective at the HS level soccer - probably not so at other levels.

So, comments are still welcome.  Playing one person off against another is/isn't a psychology topic?

Thanks!