Blocking out abuse

[chiatea]

Is it possible for someone to block out abuse from their past? What does that person do to heal if they dont remember it but are a mess?

[chiatea]

If someone has blocked out such things as locking themselves in the bathroom because they are afraid of their dad should that person do things to cause the memory to come back so they can deal with the memories. I have a fear of being trapped and i just learned i used to lock myself in the bathroom to keep away from my dad because i was afraid of him.

[chiatea]

My mom said my dad verbally abused me growing up. I dont remember this besides hearing things like... "your just like your mother... which she was a mess." Thats all i can remember right now. Even those words i dont know if i heard.

[chiatea]

Is blocking the memories out a way of healing or is it bad for you? How does one heal from emotional abuse. I havent been physically abused much but how does one heal from the emotional aspect?

[S. Earl Martin]

Chiatea: What you are asking puts people in a difficult situation. The professional's here are hesitant to answer because they are not supposed to give clinical advice unless you are a patient. The non professionals are hesitant because they don't really know how to respond and don't want to risk making the situation worse. It is best for you to ask a professional in person.

That said I can attempt to answer some of your questions.

1. Blocking out bad memories can be a way of dealing with bad situations or memories. Weather or not you have done this should be approached by a professional in a clinical situation.

2. I have spoken with my family about past situations. Everyone has there own memories and recollections about what and how something happened. Somethings I remember my family doesn't remember. Other things they remember them differently. It isn't that they are lieing. It is they had a different perspective.

Example: If I was looking at a situation? Certain aspects would be important to me. Others less important. Some I wouldn't notice at all. Over time my memory might not be so clear. Or I might chose not to remember certain aspects that I found unpleasant. The same is true for everyone. This is why eyewitness testomony is many times flawed. Even video evidence can be flawed. It is all subject to interpretation. If remembering past experiences is helping you with your problems and with your relationships? Good if not focus on something that is helping. Peace!