Why do I LOSE motivation and GIVE UP so easily???

[kyzz]

I'm a 22 year old male and have a problem and was hoping that perhaps you guys could help. I don't know what it is, I don't know if it's depression or simply a lack of motivation, but it's certainly something I do not want to have.

I WANT to accomplish things in life, the motivation exists for a short while but then it dissipates, I start to do what I need to do but then I quickly hate it, my mind makes up excuses for EVERYTHING. A simple example is losing weight, I always say things like "NOTHING is going to stop me this time" but eventually it does, then I have zero energy. My mind wants it but stops me at the same time.

Moreover I want to succeed in life, I stay home a lot (which means I don't have much friends) because, well, I don't even know...that's the problem! it's like my comfort zone and I hate it! I'm very self-conscious and I feel like losing weight will help me overcome that, but at the same time I don't have that spark.

I WANT it. I KNOW I want to succeed! How do you keep that spark in your belly continually lit? Not to sound cliche, but with it I feel invincible and like I could ANYTHING, I don't feel self-conscious, I'm able to easy interact with everybody around me, I just love that feeling...but without it I feel useless. How do I CHANGE this mentality???

What is this mental block that I have? How can I keep that spark lit? Thank you for your help guys...

[kyzz]

bump

[SWM]

I am sure sakoz has a theory that can help with this. It is to do with believing some of your images are real and the effect that has on your emotions.

maybe he'll chip in and help you. or you could seek out some of his threads.

while were waiting for that to happen, maybe you could work out what you really want.

what is it that you really want?

if you are saying things like, "i want to lose weight" what would losing weight give you? is it self esteem more confidence or something else? then when you have figured that out take another step back and look at what that would give you. if it is more confidence what would that enable you to do? if it is self esteem or something else what would that give you or enable you to do.

if you take all the things you want to achieve and go through this process you will find your true purpose in the values you hold for yourself? some where in this process you may find that you have conflicting values, example valuing self discipline while valuing freedom.

another approach to this problem is to refine the process of goal setting. you want to lose weight. how do you lose weight? instead of making your goal, "lose weight" make your goal, to go walking for half an hour per day for the first two weeks. in stead of eating less food, eat more healthy food.

this is a process of making your goals more task oriented and making the tasks achievable. like walking 2 hours a day for a week is reasonable but you would quickly lose motivation as this could be two much all at once. half an hour is more likely to keep you engaged and motivated.

by achieving these smaller goals and doing more of these task oriented goals you become more motivated not less.

hope that is enough to get you started.

[thepostman]

did it work out for u?