gamer boyfriend

[regit]

So my gamer boyfriend and we have been dating for the last 6 months. he shows his emotions very different than i do. I am very verbal and physical. I like to be near him and to feel his touch, even if its just on the arm. I say I love you about 5 times a day to him at random times, or before we hang up the phone, etc. He and his family rarely said I love you. He also is a gamer. He plays lots of different video games for hours upon hours. He has some online friends that he met through WOW (although they dont play wow anymore) and talks to them online (chat, voice chat, and they play games together).

I feel a bit left out when he plays games with them and talks to them online. He tried to play a game that we would both enjoy (and that I would be able to play) but it was difficult. We have different interests in games, and we are on completely different skill levels.

Do you think I have the right to feel left out? Do you have any suggestions about what to do about this gap?  Does anyone else have a gamer boyfriend and have had a similar issue?

any replies are great!

[rayalukkv]

You are a practical thinker and he is dreamer
and having high perceptions

if you want continue relation first you have to accept his deeds
and slowly get confidence that you support him and you donot come in between his dreams
slowly make him to think with analysis the life, pleasure etc

[squid]

Try asking him to spend more time with you.

[ConsciousPuppet]

what do you guys do to relate?
How did you meet him? as in why did u guys talk in the first place, and what about?
Was he more active in the relationship in the beginning? were u?
Do you consider you guys are friends? Trust each other? can share in a friendly way, separate from lover way?

One thing, if he's getting the attention he needs but you're not let him miss you a little, i mean gradually less contact and words, and evetually less presence. What i intend is to test his interest, which is the reason people stay together. He needs to know that he might loose you if he doesnt do anything [dont mean to be tragic]

[C0rnholio]

Yeah, CP is right. Make him miss you, play "games" with him. If he reciprocates, then it might work. Else, you are way too different to stay together.

[Xen]

Jesus, i'm having deja vu like a MF.
two people i hung out with out of many back in the day, who were dating, experienced this problem as well. the scary part is, you word for word described their situation! but it was two years ago and that situation was resolved. i dont know if this advice is too late in getting to you, but even if it is, hopefully it can be reflected on in the future.

she took my advice of trying harder to get into video games to share in his interests, since she cared about him enough to. i also tried to advise him that he should be a little more understanding of her feelings. when that plan wasnt working out, i suggested she test his interest. after a while of doing so, she found he wasnt willing to make that commitment, over his video games, and they broke up.

both people have to make an effort for there to be a relationship. its a mutual thing, not one sided. and even if things dont work out, the world goes on, as does life. there will be plenty of other opportunities.

best of luck though

[pert -5]

both people have to make an effort for there to be a relationship. its a mutual thing, not one sided. and even if things dont work out, the world goes on, as does life. there will be plenty of other opportunities.

best of luck though

Amen.

[Patrickmeister]

I would say, you both must give and take. You do not have the right to stop him from having his life (gaming), whilst he does not have the right to ignore you, or otherwise...

[acousticeagle]

From what I've observed through things I've read and articles about gaming on tv, gaming can be another form of addiction. Your feelings of being excluded, and if this continues, may be a warning sign to let you know that you are with a man who, through his avid interest in gaming, has a sense of self-absorption.

Say for instance he 'grows out' of gaming. It could be that he transfers his need to be fully involved in an activity to another activity - one in which you might again feel excluded? Gaming, or whatever pastime or interest, can feel 'need' holes in people. And rather than cultivating a mature relationship with you, he might rather pursue his own interests to fill that need. Something to consider?